Letters Unsent

Seriously, sometimes I just feel like writing anonymous/not anonymous letters to people who I think need some advice. I of course never send these letters, or even write them. But at least once a week I send people letters in my head. For instance, today I had a mental letter constructed that went as follows:

Dear Madonna,

I am in no way trying to fight you. You have scary biceps and really strange muscular thighs. But seriously, stop trying to adopt kids from Africa who already have families. I'm sure there are plenty out there who really do need adopting. And for crying out loud, do not name that child "Mercy." You are not awesome.

Love,

Kristin

This is Madonna herself, calling dibs on adopting an unsuspecting giant-headed Kanye West. Little does she know, Kanye does NOT need to be adopted, nor does he want a new mommy who could break his skull in that nutcracker armpit of hers. Quit it Madonna. Stop with the madness.

Facebook Hiatus.

I have put myself on a week-long facebook hiatus because I just know I am not going to have time to waste this week. I have too much homework. So in the meantime I will probably be blogging more when I take a break from writing papers. I mean, I can only blog for so long whereas I can spend an infinite amount of time on facebook. Its a good plan okay leave me alone. Gah. Anyway, I'm also going to be taking a break from TV. I just decided that just now. Mostly because my real point in writing this post was to share with you all one of my new favorite commercials.

Ya, I shouldn't have favorite commercials right now. Hence the TV ban. Anyway, this makes me giggle super hard. Mostly just the cyclist and the man doing the hammer dance. Enjoy.

Quote of the Day

"At some point, things will reach critial mass."

My Father is a wise man. It's totally true.

Phlebotomy

Could there be a grosser word in the whole world? I was going to post the definition... but it made me queasy just to read it so I thought I'd spare the rest of you. Anyway. No clever lead in for this blog post. I've been feeling super crappy lately and then just got a weird pain in my side... so I web MD'd it and immediately thought I had pancreatic cancer. I'm a worrier okay? haha. But really. Something was wrong. So I went to the doctor and he checked me out... had to pee in a cup.. etc. and then they wanted to get some blood. Here is the thing. Blood and needles and even the sight of the arm rubber bands make me sweaty. But I went in knowing they would want my blood (to confirm my own web MD diagnosis) so I pulled up to the table and put both my arms out like a champ, ready to be poked.

Okay so maybe I had to sip some juice because I started getting nauseous before they even started. Whatever. I was a champ. Two different nurses wiggled their fingers along my hands and insides of my elbows trying to find a vein. News flash. I don't have any. They claimed they found one and poked me anyway.. just to say "oops.. we'll have to try it again..." and then I broke. I deflated and started looking for something to puke in. Maybe some tears leaked out of my eyes. Whatever. The nurse left the room to "give me a little break" but I was done. There would be no blood coming out of me that day. So my mommy poked her head out of the door and asked if we could do it some other time. The doc wrote up an order for what he wanted done with my blood... and came in and made some jokes about African sleeping sickness and tsetse flies and slipped the word pancreatitis in there along the way. (Pancreas! I knew it!) He told me to go get it done ASAP and not dawdle. With a serious look. Laughing, joking.. then *FLASH SERIOUS LOOK* "don't dawdle." Obvious doctor scare tactic.

It worked. Sooooo Mama Booth came down and took me to the hospital today to do the tests because they are pros at getting blood out of veinless people. I warned them of my blood test phobia problem... and some sweet older phlebotomist (gag) touched my arm ONCE... poked me ONCE... and had everything done within like 30 seconds. I barely even felt it. I love her. Still... I had to chill in the chair for like a few minutes because I did almost pass out. But whatever. Done and done. Hopefully nothing is wrong. Probably nothing is wrong. We shall see. And I successfully had blood taken without crying or passing out. I seriously think that is the first time that has ever happened in my life. Go me!

Okay so maybe writing this made me really queasy and I had to run to the bathroom because I almost threw up again. I'm not a champ.