
Here are some of the best Dwight moments of all time:
"I am NOT a security threat. And my middle name is KURT. Not FART. "
"So you're PMSing pretty bad huh..."
"Every day for eight years I have brought pepper spray to work, and every day for eight years I have been laughed at. Well. Who's laughing now?"
"Yes, I have decided to shun Andy Bernard for the next three years. Which I�m looking forward to. It�s an Amish technique. It�s like slapping someone with silence. I was shunned from the age of four until my sixth birthday for not saving the excess oil from a can of tuna. "
"I never smile if I can help it. Showing one's teeth, is a submission signal in primates. Once someone smiles at me, All I see a chimpanzee begging for it's life."
"How would I describe myself? Three words � hardworking, alpha male, jackhammer. Merciless. Insatiable. "
"Once I�m officially regional manager, my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified. "
"Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Studebaker, Television, North Korea, South Korea, Marilyn Monroe. Ryan started the fire!"
"I am not a hero. I am a mere defender of the office. You know who's a real hero? Hiro, from Heroes. That's a hero. "
"No, don�t call me a hero. Do you know who the real heroes are? The guys who wake up every morning and go into their normal jobs, and get a distress call from the commissioner, and take off their glasses and change into capes, and fly around fighting crime. Those are the real heroes. "
"A 30-year mortgage at Michael's age essentially means that he's buying a coffin. If I were buying my coffin, I would get one with thicker walls so you couldn't hear the other dead people. "
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